Category Archives: Naughty

A British BBQ

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Posted on byPosted bysuperadmin

What was I saying on Friday about not wanting to do this barbecue on Saturday? I couldn’t have been more right.

I wouldn’t say I like family get-togethers. I’m forced to sip warm wine and converse with maiden aunts and weird uncles whilst scanning the room for one of my many cousins, who may rescue me. It is, as I extricate an errant hand from my behind, that I realise they managed to bow out gracefully. How is it that my excuses of actually having a life never wash with my mother?

It was my Dad’s 60th birthday, so to be truthful, I would have endured Uncle Simon’s mauling just for him. I arrived at my brother’s in Swiss Cottage with a gift basket from Selfridges and a bottle of something more substantial than Lambrini. My mum kissed me, noticed my lack of a date, and I felt for the entire world like Bridget Jones. All I needed was a turkey curry buffet and Mark Darcy in a reindeer jumper. I wanted to scream at her that I was a London escort with more admirers than Cleopatra and a more-than-attractive dowry for any suitor. However, under my guise of a £20,000 a year job in PR, I had to endure her steely gaze.

I noticed my sister hopping from foot to foot in the background, and in my haste to reach her, I was tripped up by my niece’s skipping rope and landed at the feet of her boyfriend – ‘ginger Gerry’, my ex-client. He helped me up, and as usual, neither of us looked into the eyes of the other. I’ve seen (and heard!) more than enough of him in the past for this to ever be forgotten. I said “hi” and fled.

There are four of us in our family – my eldest brother, myself, my younger sister and my baby brother. I noticed, with distaste, that my little brother managed to get out of the party unless he was late, as he often is. My mum will forgive him anything, and it makes me quite ill.

Being the “middle child”, I have always been very independent and somewhat of an enigma to my parents. The eldest brother is married with 2.4 children, an excellent job in Canary Wharf and a five-figure salary. His wife is a stay-at-home super-mum who only feeds the kids the best organic foods and comes out in hives at the mention of Wotsits or Wagon Wheels. My little sister has decided to shack up with “Ginger Gerry” and whom I hoped wasn’t about to tell me what I dread… they’ve got engaged!!!!

So the rest of the afternoon/evening/next morning was spent admiring her rock, planning colours and what would be fabulous on me as the maid of honour. It pained me to think I would soon be related to someone who has paid for my time and company, but I know neither of us will ever mention it nor burst her bubble.

On a lighter note, my thinking time kept me up during the small hours on Sunday, so I managed to finish my book – yes, it was brilliant. And I need a little BDSM to help clear my head. I have a somewhat willing client who likes to clean my toilet with a toothbrush – maybe I’ll call him.

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Horror dates

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Posted on byPosted bysuperadmin

I won’t lie… I wouldn’t say I like scary films. Something makes my brain work overtime, and I get carried away and lost in my “what if” fantasies or complete nightmares! I have always loved a good old-fashioned rom-com or sci-fi film. Nothing comes creeping out from behind you in your bathroom, and kids don’t suddenly become possessed and turn demonic as the sun goes down. I grew up in the leafy and child-friendly borough of Hampstead. I attended school with other generally lovely children and their parents, whom I know would never let them watch anything scarier than Count Duckula!!

Jeff is my client for the day and night, requesting the pleasure of his sexy blonde escort to give him some good old girlfriend experience, and has asked me to come over to his house in Belgravia to eat dinner and watch films. Jeff is a 40-something gazillionaire, and he most certainly likes all his mod cons: colossal plasma screen and surround sound. He has told me that he wants to play a real chivalrous man and woman in a relationship where said man and woman watch terrifying films, and the man looks after the woman as she nestles into his shoulder for protection. Bless him for wanting to wave his you-know-what around and hold me in his big, muscly arms, but I am quite frankly terrified. I told him this was a great idea and I would bring extra popcorn in my best enthusiastic tone. Still, inside, I was already screaming into my pillow at the mere thought of the fangs, creaking doors and candles being blown out by some genuinely horrifying unidentified thing.

I never refuse any challenge or date suggested by my clients, as you well know, but I can honestly say I was so close. Closer than the time Bob took me shopping outside of London on a high street with just a QS and a C&A knockoff shop. You can also imagine my disgust when he told me we were going out for dinner in the West End (cue me perking up) to be taken to a fast food job down a side street.

Okay, nothing will be as wrong as that… bring on the screams of terror…yikes!

Posted in Posted in24/7, Blonde, Central London, Escorts, Naughty, West End Tagged Tags: , , , , ,

Swinging fun

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The best nights out are when you must wait for the venue. London holds mystery whether you are going somewhere as mainstream as Chelsea or somewhere lesser known for its nightlife like Sloane Square. My clients live in the more popular areas of the city, and I do like to travel around the capital and see how they live in the uber-posh Belgravia or even my neighbours in Kensington. Not only do my clients live in some gorgeous places, but they know some gorgeous people, and Franc likes to mix quite literally with those attractive others.

So, back to my date in a venue just given out as ‘TBC’. Franc told me the genre, and I love fetish parties with a twist. It got me as excited as the first time Franc ever saw his favourite escort in leather with my hair in pigtails. The beauty of the fetish with a twist is to understand that it’s not all dungeons and underground madness; it’s about following the correct etiquette and thoughtful respect for what you are taking part in.

Some of Franc’s friends hold themed parties in their trendy Kensington apartments, and he has taken me along a few times to get into the swing of things before we hit public gatherings. The good thing about being an open-minded 24-hour escort is that nothing fazes me, and just as well seeing that it’s most certainly a case of ‘what happens in private(s), stays private’. It sounds like my personal elite escort oath…other than sharing my tales of debauchery with you.

Hedonism is, I think, ironically derived from a very playful word meaning “delight”. Believing that you should benefit from anything delightful and pursue pleasure to its fullest is what it’s all about in the beautiful world of anything. What an utterly fabulous way to express yourself as well. I always look forward to pencilling Franc in.

So, should I mix leather and pearls or latex and diamonds? I know… I may blend Franc and his friend Ray.

Posted in Posted in24 hour, 24hr, Blonde, Kensington, Naughty Tagged Tags: , , , ,

Business and Pleasure

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Posted on byPosted bysuperadmin

You would think I’d never be lonely or have the ability to remember everyone’s names, given the number of people I socialise with within a week. You’d be wrong. I have some clients who are a one-hit-wonder, a flash in the pan. And then there are my regulars who see me on a specific day or week of the month and treat me as they would a long-distance girlfriend. These are the ones I miss and the ones I organise my life around. And one of these gentlemen is Jake.

Jake is American and flies over every month from Chicago. He owns 50% of a web design company that has a studio on each side of the Atlantic, and he takes it in turn with his business partner to fly out every two weeks – which is where I come in. On roughly the 1st and 15th of the month, I get the girlfriend treatment. Jake and I spend one of the days as an in-call (my apartment usually) catching up, dining on take-out and re-familiarising ourselves until the wee hours. The other day is a proper date – we go into The West End, catch a show and dine late into the evening on Steak and Chips in Leicester Square. I always make sure I wear a skirt and heels as Jake prefers the feminine look on women, and jeans don’t do it for him. I came to realise this during a rather emotional solo in Les Miserables a few months back – except Jake’s hand had snaked under my hem, but his eyes were straight ahead!

So anyway – it dawned on me I would be seeing Jake next Thursday, which is a few days earlier than it is usually. Which also made me wonder what I could do to wind him up between now and then. There’s no point in writing him a letter or texting him – but Skype allows for video calling, and I did have a brand new set of lingerie that had come from La Perla’s Vintage Limited range. I know I know, I said I wouldn’t put any more tiny bras and knickers into my underwear drawer… but they were begging me to buy them, and all that black lace came with a matching shrug. It would have been criminal to refuse.

So I sent Jake an email telling him to meet me on Skype at 10 pm GMT (allowing for the six hours time difference), arranged myself on my bed, hair over my shoulders and told him, “I hope you realise what you’re missing…” That man didn’t know what hit him. Thank goodness we were alone on our computers, and he had blinds in his office because things got pretty steamy after that, and I retired to bed with a naughty grin on my face. Poor Jake had to finish a day’s work distracted beyond anything (he said) he had known before.

So now I’m looking forward to our subsequent encounter and I think I’ll meet him at Heathrow Airport as a surprise. It may be a professional relationship when you strip it back, but there’s nothing quite like mixing business with pleasure.

Posted in Posted inCentral London, English, Fantasy, Naughty, West End Tagged Tags: , , , , , , ,

For the love of chocolate…

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Posted on byPosted bysuperadmin

I love chocolate. Show me a woman who doesn’t, but when your date is obsessed with “playing” with the sweet stuff, you get sick of it.

Haz is a regular of mine who loves to get up close and personal covered in milk dark and white chocolate. Our first get-together was in his presidential suite at his Kensington Hotel. He owns the building and lives there, and his penthouse is most spectacular. We went out for dinner, and he wined and dined me like I hadn’t been in a long time. It almost felt like an actual date where the male of the species feels he has to wow and impress his female companion. We ate and laughed and danced when no one else was, and he promised me more dates like this. His apparent penchant for brunette escorts has preceded him, and I had heard from his other elite favourites that if he likes you, he will buy you jewels and treat you like a princess. Still, if you take his fancy, he will let you see his secret room in his humble (cough) abode.

Haz is so camp in his attire and furnishings you would almost assume he is gay, but let me assure you, he certainly isn’t. I was lucky enough to play my own wooing game and snagged myself a few treats from some gorgeous couture boutiques in Chelsea, and then we stumbled across a very well-known but cheaper store to purchase some nice but VERY inexpensive undies. I wondered why we were buying these frilly smalls in under a fiver, but it wasn’t until I saw the secret room covered in plastic sheeting and the bowls of chocolate sauce that I realised that we would be throwing anything we started off wearing away.

So, dinner and no dessert led to drinks and the intention of coffee back at his home, which soon led to “we weren’t coming back for coffee, let’s visit the playroom” for some choccy fun.

On went the polyester set, and out came the choccy weapons. It was fun, but I swear I’m still cleaning out the fruit and nut from places it really shouldn’t have gone…

Our London companions know how to have fun, so if you fancy some fun and frolics mixed in with a bit of chocolate, then why not give us a call? And we can hook you up with one of our flirty females, which will make you forget yourself for a few hours – or even longer!! You only live once, so give us a try, and you’ll be hooked!

Posted in Posted inBrunette, Central London, Escorts, Fetish, Naughty Tagged Tags: , , , ,