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Now I’m not being biased, but I must say I do have some damn good ideas when it comes to pleasing my clients and those of my colleagues. I have been known to wow my peers on my own, which has led to them asking me for advice on all sorts of things. Whether they are new to the company or have been with it for a long time, I get pounced on during our monthly catch-ups, and no more so than during the one we had today.

One of the team’s newer members, a sultry Blonde, asked me not only for advice but also to join her on a big client date. Dan, the client in question, is a regular with everybody! He loves women, and in his eyes, the more, the merrier.

He also likes to have a mix-up from week to week, so he may book you twice a month and then not call you for a few months. So, when you have a date with him, it’s essential to keep his interest and make him want to return for more. “Dan” is an international playboy in his spare time and must have a few girls in every city.

I accompanied him to what he initially called a business meeting in New York, followed by a cocktail party at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel. However, it turned out to be Dan’s private ‘cocktail’ party with two escorts while he watched us.

A strategy designed to impress.

My platinum friend then asked me to devise a plan to impress, amaze, and tire him out. He has booked a suite in one of Knightsbridge’s most upscale hotels and has given her an open budget for the evening. We decided to go shopping together, chatting as we browsed. After all, we’re women; multitasking is our forte!

Dan, 42, is stunning, loves women and wealth, wields power, and owns 14 businesses, including a fashionable restaurant with a beautiful dining room in Sloane Square, overlooking Tiffany and Links. Being a busy man, I aimed to pamper him so he wouldn’t have to lift a finger, unless we placed something strategically within his reach. So, we headed to Harrods to buy some exquisite champagne, chocolate truffles, and other luxury treats to spoil the testosterone-fueled gentleman!

He won’t know what hit him after we finally paused to admire our purchases and exchanged a well-deserved high five. We’ll keep you updated!

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When you have regular clients who need to re-book you for specific functions, you have to keep on your toes and bring change into the ‘relationship’ more than ever. I always attend Scott’s work, family, and social arrangements as his girlfriend, but to keep the booking, I have to keep him interested, just as you would in an actual relationship. This is why I’m single. These things are hard work.

Scott is a 40-something billionaire who loves to maintain appearances. He lets his staff run his hotel empire and reaps the rewards by holidaying on his private island, lounging in his luxury mansion in Hampstead and shopping in New York for the afternoon. He uses me as his long-term girlfriend stand-in. In reality, he has no interest in forming a relationship with someone he doesn’t know, who may only be after his money.

In my mind, it’s classic real commitment issues, but what do I know? I’m a London escort, not a psychologist! So, he takes me to work functions, family weddings, press nights, and the works, but he also brings me shopping to cater to such arrangements. That’s why, to keep this gig, I need to up my game.

As you know, I’m a very proud brunette, but when he mentions that he finds a particular blonde celebrity attractive, I crack out my favourite Barbie wig and act out any fantasy he wants. He loves the fact that he doesn’t even have to ask. Sometimes, when you spend a lot of time with a client, you do pick up on certain things. Whether they like olives, whether they prefer Gucci to Dior, whether they book a hotel more in Mayfair than in Knightsbridge and whether they respond in pleasure at being tickled just under the…

We have a great partnership with Scott. I have even managed to wrap his very protective Mother around my little finger. Little does she know that the boy is having a faux relationship with a top call girl! We have learned to walk in time with one another, laugh at the same things and finish each other’s sentences. We have been on many dinner and drink dates to get to know each other in such a way.

What can I say? I’m a dedicated woman.